Monday, February 10, 2020

Rolling Stone - Finally Home by Nicole

Rolling Stone - Finally Home
Freed from the Caged Bird
 
For many years I felt like a captured caged bird that sings and sings and sings, just waiting for someone to come by, open the caged door and allow me to fly free.
 
After months of rehabilitation, I realized that my post-stroke nourishment is releasing me from the emotional bird cage that binds me. 
 
My post-stroke feeding is forcing me to look into the mirror and see my kindred spirit knocking at the door; a kindred spirit that takes me so deep that I do not realize where I have gone until the zone hits me forward-on.
 
My post-stroke feeding is healing my soul.
 
After having my stroke, I had to flip that feeling of anger.  Like many others I asked myself, why did I have a stroke? Being the youngest sibling, why me? My resounding answer was, “why not me”. 
 
As a little girl, up to a large portion of my elder-hood years, I felt like that captured caged bird, constantly wondering where I belong, where I belong.  Do I really belong here?    
 
Being a wanderer, I remember moving from job to job, home to home, searching for that perfect job and that perfect place to live.  I became so excited with that new job or new home… until the novelty wore off.  One day I asked myself, what am I running from?  What am I running to?
 
Being so restless, like the caged bird, I finally realized, I was running from myself.  Every job I worked, every home I moved into, each time I was taking me along with it.
 
My post-stroke rehab is gentle forcing me to take the time out to see my life for what it is, freeing myself from that cage.
 
My post-stroke life is teaching me to understand that as aphasia comes in different storms and waves, you just ride it out.
 
In my heart of hearts, my post-stroke life is teaching me to understand that beauty is truth, and that truth is beauty.
 
My post-stroke life is showing me that rainbows and butterflies dance in the sunset.
My post-stroke life is showing me how to open up the door of my bird cage, accept who I am, and come out ‘flying into the storm’.
 
And above all, my post-stroke life shows me…
my life is just a rolling stone that finally, finally has come home.
 
Word:  We start off very low and rise up high, telling people who we really are***
 

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